Back to Reality

I just took a trip to Wisconsin, and had an amazing time. I got to see all my kids, and spend a lot of time with the Konopacki family preparing for H.'s baptism. It was exactly the break I needed, and there wasn't much down-time to think about anything stressful. It was a great week spent with great friends!

That being said, my first two days back have been pretty rough. Last night, we responded to a very bad accident involving some local teens. Unfortunately, one young man didn't make it. This is a terrible tragedy anytime, but in a small area where everyone knows everyone, it makes it so much harder. I just can't get the picture of his mother's face out of my head. Being as empathetic as I am, my heart was literally breaking with hers, even though I didn't know this young man that well. And his poor classmates...it's only been a little over a year since they lost yet another classmate in an accident. And I worry about our new crop of First Responders, as they went to school with him, and that it may deter them now from wanting to do the important work we do. This is exactly why I do it...because I can do it. I don't really know how to explain it, it's just something inside me that wants to help others in times of need.

Today was full of sanitizing and washing fire gear, ambulance equipment, etc. Not exactly how I wanted to spend my morning, but it has to be done. And then I get back to work. When I left for vacation, our kids were very well behaved and getting good behavior grades. Apparently last week that all went out the window. Nothing, and I mean nothing, irritates me more than having to repeat myself. (Well, that's not entirely true. People who are able to do certain things, but are unwilling to do them is another one of my pet-peeves. Ohhh, just thinking about some people I know that are like that is making my face red!) Anyway, I have this one young man who thinks his grin will get him out of everything. One of our big rules is to not manipulate, and this young man doesn't seem to care about it. We had a long discussion a few weeks ago about it, and why his behavior grade was so low because he couldn't follow it. It seems that I just wasted my breath, because he had the nerve to ask myself and two other staff members (while in my presence) the same question, to see if he'd get a different answer. By this point, I'd had enough, and sent him back to his room. His locked room.

This wasn't a big deal, and it wasn't the first time he had been sent back. At the end of the night, however, my supervisor pulls me aside and tells me that he didn't want me "yelling" at the kids when I sent them back. ***Some background info: I have never been as micromanaged in my life as I have been since I've worked here. Seriously. And it's nit-picky stuff, too. Every week the management meets, and they type up "minutes" to post, basically calling out everything they think we do wrong. It may not actually be wrong, but they prefer we do it differently. Whatever.*** Anyway, said supervisor told a kid two weeks ago, "You're acting like a f..king idiot" in front of other kids, but me raising my voice to a kid telling him to go back to his room is wrong. Oh, I see, it's a "do as I say, not as I do" situation. I totally understand why he wants me to not do so, but have an issue with it being okay for some to make up their own rules. I also understand that most of my kids shut down when voices are raised. But, quite frankly, I'd had enough. I just watched a family lose their son last night, and now I have to deal with this little punk? I just want to go back on vacation!!!!

Back to reality...this is my reality...*sigh*. Here's hoping the rest of the week goes smoothly, and the weekend is nice!

Introducing....

Hi! I think my name is going to be Jack, but I'm not too sure yet. My family is crazy...well, except for my auntie...I love her! She took like a bazillion pictures of me today! I arrived in Illinois yesterday...before that, I lived in Florida. The grass and ground are soooo much softer here! I'm 8 weeks old, and my sister and I moved to Illinois to be with our new families. Luckily, we'll only live a few blocks from each other. My first "dad", Chuck, is really good friends with my new "dad", Brad (my auntie AJ's brother) and my sister's new "dad", James. I think I'm really going to like it here!

I hope I get to meet all of you soon!

Check ya later!

On Thursday morning, I'll be headed out of town for my annual Girl's Trip. It was my year to plan, and I'm hoping we have a great time. We're headed to Sullivan, MO, and will be doing some rafting, floating, drinking and hanging out! I'm sure I'll have some pictures and stories to post later. I hope you all have a great end to your week, and a great weekend! I'll be back Sunday night! See ya!

So much to say...

So, I always think that I have nothing important to blog about, but as I made a list of things I need to blog about...well, it's a pretty long list! Thus far this summer, I've spent a lot of time with friends. Though my to-do list keeps getting longer, I think I'll keep spending time with friends. It's been a wonderful summer! My cousins have a boat, and I've spent many a Sunday on the lake with them. It might possibly be my favorite place to be. I love our lake!

In early June, I went to Milwaukee to see "my kids." I missed them terribly! The foster babies have gotten so big, and we played a lot! E. turned 5...wow! It seems like she was just born yesterday. My girly-girl wanted a makeover, and this is what she got:

Who cares that it took twice as long to take off as it did to put on? We know how to have fun!

I guess the most influential thing that has happened recently is that we had to lay off 6 people on July 1st. Add these 6 to the 3 who have left over the last year, we are down 9 staff members. Over this past winter, our numbers were so low that this change probably would have been somewhat unnoticed. However, starting about June 28th, we filled up. Nothing like having 2 open beds AND being down 9 staff. Needless to say, I have been BUSY. The paperwork and research I used to do during short breaks at work is now done at home in my free time, and in my 8 hour shifts I have to do about 12 hours of work. All of this, paired with the fact that I now also run transportation (3 of the layoffs were our transportation officers.) This means that even if I'm in the middle of doing 3 things, if a county calls to detain a kid, I (or someone else on the floor) has to leave to go get them. I'm not going to say it's been horrible, but it is hard having to say goodbye to friends. We are one big dysfunctional family, and it's hard when someone leaves (by choice or otherwise.) And I am truly exhausted at the end of every day. This is somewhat of a double-edged sword: I'm doing tons of extra running around, but my days are usually jam-packed and being exhausted all the time is really cutting into my productivity. I'm hoping my body gets used to it, because I don't foresee many changes in the near future.

Hmm...what else? Oh, my brother's fiancee and her two kids from a previous marriage moved from Florida to Illinois around the 4th of July. It's exciting to have them here, and I'm hoping that this area is good to them. I feel bad, though, that they don't really know anyone here, and that my brother is gone for about 2 weeks at a time. I've been trying to fill their days, but the exhaustion is really kicking my butt! They've been keeping my mom busy...they love her baked goods :). You know she loves to feel needed, so this is right up her alley!

One of my oldest friends just returned from her tour in Afghanistan, and a bunch of our high school group were able to get together for a cookout. We haven't remained extremely close, but we always seem to have a good time when we're together. It's funny to see where life has taken all of us, yet none of our values have changed much. We're still the same girls, but we've all had much different experiences now.

In a random addition, I have a Droid phone (which I love more than cheese...that's a lot!) I love all the apps that can be downloaded, but my current favorite is FXCamera. It allows me to take pictures with different effects, such as turning a pic into an Andy Warhol-type colorblock print. It's so much fun! My favorite effect is fisheye, and here is a sneak peak at my "FishEyeAlbum":

This is my friend Kylie...and I'm so glad she doesn't read my blog!!! I laughed at this picture until I fell asleep that night, then woke up the next morning still laughing! Yeah, it doesn't take much to entertain me!

Today, I took two of my kids from work to go help set up for Relay for Life. My cousin is the local chairperson, and I always try to help her out. I think it's important for my kids to understand the impact of service to others. And I'm never disappointed! For juvenile delinquents, they sure do like to please people! I think that most of my kids haven't been praised or thanked for much, and that was definitely apparent today. They were soaking it up! They work hard, work fast, and then thank me for taking them! Really helps lighten a bad mood!

Phew! I guess that's it for me. So sorry I've been out of touch...I've been blog-stalking all of you, just haven't had the time to comment. I know, I suck. I promise to try to get better! I hope you all have a wonderful weekend!