"Why'd ya have to go and make things so complicated?.."

Hmmm...let's see. Where to start. Well, I guess I should write that I still live in the house I grew up in. No, I don't have a fear of leaving home, and no, I'm not a leech. I live in a town of 800 or so people, and there aren't many places to rent. I WILL NOT live in an apartment building in this town. They are nasty, dirty little places and have had to accept HUD housing to make ends meet. Nope, I'm not doing it. It's bad enough I live 1 1/2 blocks away from them as it is. Also, I have to stay in this town if I want to remain on the fire/EMS service...and I do, for now anyway. To add to this, my mom works from 3:30 PM- 7:00 AM, and my dad is gone 10 out of 14 days. Combine their schedule with mine, and we don't really run into one another. Up until last week, someone had to be here with Butch, as being alone for 16 hours per day wasn't really to his liking. Also, in the past 5 years, my parents have had various medical issues, and I needed to be here to care for them.

That being said...I HATE this house! Okay, I shouldn't say that. I will say that my parents have not done necessary things to "keep up" this house. I could make a list, but I don't have the patience or energy right now. So I will fill you in on what is bothering me the most. A couple years ago, we had a really bad wind storm here, and we were without power for 5-ish days. It was in the middle of August and it was H-O-T!!! We come from a family of farmers, so we always have tons of meat. Well, we almost lost about $2000 worth of meat, as the generators were having a hard time keeping up with the freezers. Anyway, my parents decided they were getting too old to be without power for that long, so they bought a whole-house generator. I should add that my father has, what I call, a lack of attention to detail. He bought the damn thing before he realized that the electrical hookup and the natural gas hookup were on opposite sides of the house...a ranch-style house. So we would need to run a gas line to power the SOB. Fast forward to Sept. 9, 2009, we are going to have the damn thing installed (after looking at it sit on the patio for approx. 12 power-outages.)

Earlier this summer, my mom and I noticed that some bees were going in and out of the bottom of the siding, right near where the generator was to be installed. We've used approx. 25 bottles of wasp/bee killer, but they just keep multiplying. My dad was just home for 10 days...6 days longer than his normal breaks...and accomplished nothing. Wait, I take that back, he did change the toilet seat...my bad. I told him that we had a bee issue 3 months ago, and 2 1/2 months ago, and 2 months ago...you get the picture. Did he do anything...nope. So, figuring that these bees are going to attack the workers tomorrow, I take matters into my own hands. I bet I killed 1000 bees today. I was so proud of myself, until I realized they just kept swarming. I didn't even make a dent. So I decided to do some research and see if there was something else I could do. I find out that they probably have one big-ass colony behind the siding, and the only way to remedy it is to remove the siding and clean house. I also read that you can hear them through the wall with a stethoscope. So, I get mine from the car and go into the laundry room to see if I can find them. I hear buzzing, but not from the stethoscope. THEY ARE IN OUR F#^KING HOUSE!!!! Apparently, they did not like being sprayed with poison, so they came inside. F#^K ME! Did I mention that we have wood siding, and whatever lame-ass carpenter built that part of the house didn't bother putting up drywall...just siding, insulation and paneling. Yep, f#^k me. And apparently, they are honeybees, and they are protected. I've called beekeepers, but they don't want them; exterminators tell you to call beekeepers. Envious yet? We have to get rid not only of the bees, but also the honeycomb and honey, as it will begin fermenting without bees to care for it...imagine that lovely smell.

So, tomorrow I have to call the insurance guy to see if this qualifies for a claim, then find someone brave enough to come take the siding down. For you Theory of a Deadman fans: "I hate my job, all of my rich friends, I hate everyone to the bitter end. Nothing turns out right, there's no end in sight, I hate my life!" Not really, but how fitting. I guess we'll see what tomorrow brings!